Ajax's child hood

[swan12]

Ajax 13 year old boy, a drunken father and a poor mother.

Father: Ajax, AJAX!!!!! get up!!
(ajax wakes with a headache)
Father:Don't make me punch you in tha face again like what i did last night!
Ajax: Ok.....dad a feww.....morre seconds......
(Ajaxs dad comes up to his room)
Father: Ajax i'll come up in there with a bat now get dressed for school!
Ajax: I hate school i always get picked on
Father:well whip there ass you have to get a education
Ajax whats so great about school?
(ajax's dad walks in his room and grabs him by the neck)
Father:if you don't go to school i'll use u as dart practice
(ajax quickly gets out of bed and goes to the kitchen)
Ajax:what are we having for breakfest i wonder?
Father:make it yourself kid i'm to tired
Ajax:whatever
(ajax makes breakfest)
a few minutes pasts by and ajax is on the bus to school
Kid1:ajax headsup
(ajax looks up and notices that a book is flying through the air,hits him in the face)
(kids start laughing)
that minute ajax gets up and nails the kid in the face
Ajax:try doing that again you you chicken nugget!
(the bus stops)
bus driver:ajax sit down and shutup!!
Ajax:yesmam
Kid1:i'll meet you at the pole 3:00 after school
after school at the flag pole
Ajax:where are they
voice:right behind you
(ajax turns around)
(5 friends appear)
Kid1:lets fight ajax
Ajax:your such a wimp
Part 2 coming soon

[swan12]

i need to make it longer part 2 will be good tomorrow

[KingOfTheWarlords]

It,s nice but i'm not sure Ajax's real name is Ajax, keep written

[PUNKS]

This is cool. I want to see what happens next with Ajax and Kid1. Keep writing! 

[CleonWarlord]

I enjoyed it, put some more suspense. Like fast -paced action. Keep writing buddy.

[Ajax_91]

its preety cool. i cant imagine ajax actually being called well. "ajax" at 13 even lol

but keep writing its preety good so far! 

[swan12]

(ajax stands there stunned)
Kid1:well well you wanna fight ajax come get some
(the kids are holding bats)
Ajax to himself:(i got to think of somethin to say)
Ajax:I'll shove those bats up....up your but
(silence occurs)
Kid1:ok
Kid1:lets get him!!!!
(the kids run at him)
(ajax runs to an alley)
Ajax:oh shit!!!
(Ajax stares at a wall)
Kid1:well ajax your cornered
(ajax looks around and finds a knife)
Ajax:back off i'll stab ever one of ya'll
(kids back up instead of kid 1)
Kid 1:you are the most stupidest kid on the planet ajax
(kid 1 runs to him swingin the bat)
(ajax throws knife at him and curves up in a ball)
(silence comes back)
kid 2: you asshole you killed him!!!!!
kid 1:som..e.....one ......get HELP
(kid 1 chokes to death)
Ajax:i didn't mean to!
(ajax runs home crying)
Father: hey ajax how was school
(ajax is still crying)
Ajax:Ddad ii need help
Father:What happened
Ajax:i i kil
(police knock on the door)
Police1:open up this is the police!!!!!
Father:ok hold on
Police1:we need you to come to downtown
Ajax:mme?
Police1:no your dad
Father:Oh shit!!!
(father runs to his room and takes out a shotgun)
Father:get the (bad word deleted) out of my house!
Police1: hes got a gun!
Police2:traquilazir him
(father drops to the floor)
Police1:take him in
(police cuff him and put him in the car)
Ajax:........What the?
Part 3 coming soon

[swan12]

i'll realy need to make this longer

[Ajax_91]

yeah its a little too short. but sometimes less is more. and its still preety good! keep it up.

[PUNKS]

This is good. I really want to see what happens with Ajax and his dad. Keep writing man!

[Vermin/Cowboy]

Yo, I'm just warning u now, keep on cursing, even using * in them, u'll get banned !

[warrior swan]

i hope part 3 comes soon i like this story but ajax sounds a little bit to soft

[Warrior_Swan]

Ajax does sound a little soft, but I support this decision for several reasons. One being creative license, which everyone has a right to, even when using well-known characters, and the second being that Ajax is young here, this could be before he was a tough guy. I was just like this version of Ajax until I was 14, that's when I started fighting back, and became harder. And my second point here, is that a lot you think that Ajax isn't his real name, but in light of how his dad acts, I think it's entirely possible that Ajax could in fact ne his real name. His dad could possibly have named him after the hard-bum greek warrior, hoping he would grow up to be strong. Just a thought, sometimes ya gotta read between the lines to understand things, and make up stuff yourself as you read. I find that reading is more enjoyable that way. Anyways dude, awesome story, keep writing.

[Ajax jr]

Wow, i would never of thought of that! Ajax sounds soft, and the parts are short but good job, if this is ur first time.

[warlord jp]

This story is great man! Keep it up!!